Inspiration

Holiday Shopping

My holiday shopping is almost done, but is that what is getting me to post again. No, not at all because really most of my gifts were purchased before Thanksgiving. I hate holiday crowds. Unless I am getting paid for the time at the mall, I avoid them at all cost.

What I have come to talk about is shopping for a wedding gown. Yes, I said it a wedding gown. I recently became engaged and am not planning for a wedding until late next year, but I would like to plan ahead.

Do you realize that the bridal magazines are really just made for skinny chicks? Nothing against skinny chicks, but how am I supposed to figure out how that will look over my curves. I purchased a magazine to get inspiration, but it really just frustrated me. (I might have to add a whole new thing to my list of things to accomplish before I die.)

The Perfect Jeans for Your Body

Tonight, I began to read the The Perfect Jeans for Your Body on MSN.com. I must admit that I was a little skeptical that they were even going to get close to covering my body type. Almost every article that ever had with a title similar has missed the mark of what I consider a plus-sized woman. I really became skeptical when I saw that the article was from Glamour. These types of articles usually end with a size 12/14. That might work for most women, but when your size starts in the twenties, what do you do then.

Every woman goes through the hunt for the perfect jeans, but it has been as if the magazine world didn't seem to understand that we, meaning the sizeable women, might want to find jeans for their body type.

So, I began to read the article anyway. I was very shocked that on slide 9 and 10, they began to discuss jeans for real plus-sized women. They were even cute jeans. I was surprised. They covered jeans that I would actually like to own. One brand in particular is from Svoboda.

Pricing Disparity.

I am currently dating an African man. I enjoy his company and realize that I really do like him in my life. While dating him, we have had man discussions about clothing because I believe he was under belief that I might be a little too showy in my clothing choices. I really don't think I am, but I like to mess with him about it.

Towards the beginning of our relationship, I discover that his sister was engaged to be married. It is assumed that I will be there for the wedding. So the search for a dress to wear to a wedding began. There were specific parameters that needed to be met for both my boyfriend and I would be satisfied. He wanted the dress to be long because all of the African women would be wearing long dresses. He began to pick out dresses that looked more like what an African woman would wear instead of what I would wear. A friend of mind asked if wanted to wear traditional African wear to the wedding. I explained to her I love the outfits, but I wouldn't fill comfortable because it isn't something that I wear often. I didn't want to be uncomfortable when meeting my boyfriend's mother and the rest of his family for the first time.

Well, we found a dress that made us both happy. We found the dress at Marshalls in Matthews, NC. The dress was beautiful. It was long. It covered me. I felt that it was fashionable and it fit. I wanted the dress. Since, it was Marshall's the dress really didn't cost that much at $39.99. Unfortunately, neither one of had the money on us to cover the whole thing. I told him that I would come back the next day to buy the dress. When I got the rest of the money. Well, I never made it back to the Matthews to buy the dress. Over the North Carolina Sales Tax Holiday just a few days later, we were in the Marshalls the University Area of Charlotte, NC. We were looking for things for him, but I decided to just see if this location had the dress because I figure that the dress is probably already sold at the Matthews store. I am so happy when I found the dress. I was even more excited when I found the dress for $19.99. As happy as I was, I really became concerned about the price difference. The dress at the University location had already had a markdown sticker on it before the one that said $19.99.

How can the same exact dress, same exact size, have two major different prices? The lesson learned is that I might have to check more than one Marshalls to make sure that I am getting the best price.

The Adventures of Dress Shopping

I have I truly expressed my dislike for shopping in my current body. I believe my body wasn't made for the clothing that is currently available. (And before you respond, YES...I am doing something about it).

Well, I asked a friend of mine to help me to go dress shopping. I believe that if I am going to go shopping for things that I know will be an ordeal take backup. So, my size 8/10 friend (she would hate that I have revealed her size, but I am not mentioning names) went with me shopping. Or should I say, I went with her shopping for clothes to fit me.

First stop: Ross.

I need to give my disclaimer...if you think I dislike shopping, I absolutely hate shopping at discount stores. I hate having to search through the mounds and mounds of clothing. So what do I do? I let her look. She picked out a few dresses. Some completely against my better judgement. I reminded her that I have situations that won't allow for some of the types of dresses that she was picking. She told me to essentially shut up and try them on.

We went to the fitting room. I went in with 8. Eight dresses that I have to figure out will work with my current situation. The fitting room is the worst place in a store to be. It is even worse on the week that you are about to start your period. Everything is different on my body during that week.

Well, I tried on the first one. Not bad, but a smoother would be great..how much do Spanx cost again? At this point, my friend realized that I had beautiful legs and reprimanded me for not wearing dresses. Needless to say, I already knew I had great legs. "I would show them off more often if I could find dresses to fit", I said. Hence, the shopping.

The second dress, OMG...I am cute....okay, okay...a little over the top, but I looked good in a sleeveless dress. It would look better if I had the right bra on (see The Adventures of Bra Shopping). I wore the wrong bra today, obviously I forgot that I wanted to go shopping.

Well, I am not going to go through each dress, but I found 2 that I liked. What surprised me is that they were both sleeveless and didn't make me look horrible. I wasn't ready to buy, but they are on my list.

Then she suggested a place call Conway. (I tried to find a link, but I couldn't find one). Think Rainbow. I remember shopping at stores like this when I was between the ages of 18 and 24. It was the clothing that I was just wearing to go to a party or club. It wasn't clothing you invested in. I think we were in the store for all of 10 minutes because I wasn't impressed.

Crisis Assistance Ministry

Today was a complete blessing. This blessing came out of what I thought was slightly, okay more than slightly, annoying addition of a class to my schedule. Two weeks ago, I noticed online that a class was added to my schedule at The Art Institute of Charlotte without my knowledge that I even needed to take the class. I was very upset by the way things were handled after that, but things have settled and I have settled into the class.

The class is Community Service. As a class, we are responsible for completing 6 community service projects. The first one was created by the school. It was to help out at Crisis Assistance Ministry . Crisis Assistance Ministry services the low-income citizens of Mecklenburg County, often classified as "the working poor," who are facing financial emergencies and are struggling to meet life's basic needs. Everyday citizens can go there to get everyday household items, including clothing, and get assistance with rent and utilities.

The blessing came when we were given a tour of their facilities. The fact that they set it up actually like a store touched me. It maintains dignity. The one thing missing in there set up, is the fact that plus size clothing didn't have their own section. I don't know I really don't like digging through about 8 racks of clothing to only find out there is nothing there to fit me.

After the tour, we were able to get a chance to help them sort clothing. So the 11 of us began to sort clothing. Our teacher was right there sorting with us, I appreciated that. We had so much fun..joking around and singing the songs from the radio...that we sorted about 8 rolling laundry bins of clothing.

Bargain Shopping

As a full-figured woman, I have that friend who is always telling me about that find that she found at Salvation Army, Value Village or any other thrift store. Keep in mind this friend is about a size 8/10. I love her. I am happy for her finding these things, but really could she stop telling me and trying to get me to go.

When I go, I find junk in my size. She tells me that I am not going to the right one. I have gone to every single one that she has gone to. It is junk in my size. The reason that I am finding junk is because the other women my size are probably holding to everything that they have ever worn between a size 18 to 24 like I hold on to my items. There things that you never want to fit into again, but the amount of money paid for the item is too much to depart from the item.

The other thing is that the close are not sized. I hate looking through clearance racks at Macy's, so for me there is less of a chance that I am going to devote my time to looking through racks at these stores.

Presidental Inauguration

Yes, I was one of the millions in the crowd. I had driven home, but because of the bitter cold decided I wasn't going to go. I had spoken with all of my cousins as they tried to convince me to go, but I was thinking I really didn't want to deal with the cold or the crowds.

Then my parents got a call about tickets to go to a ball. A CEO of a company wasn't going to be able to attend and asked my parents if they wanted to go to the Texas Black Tie and Boots Ball. After deciding to go to the ball, my mother asked if I could stay to help her dress. They looked amazing, if I do say say so my self. My nephew, his girlfriend, and I looked at my parents like we were the proud parents sending our children out for their prom. I became chauffer and drove them to the ball at the Gaylord National Resort and Convention Center. They had a lot of fun.

When I got back from dropping them off, my nephew informs me that he and his girlfriend are going and they really want me to go with them. My nephew felt it would be a shame for me to have driven up and not go. So, I decided to go. At that time, I realized that means that I wasn't going to really get any sleep. I had to pick my parents up at 1 in the morning. Luckily, the resort is only 15 minutes away from my parents house. My nephew planned on getting up at 5 in the morning to go downtown. So that seemed like I would get about 3 1/2 hours of sleep. Well that didn't happen. I got back to the National Harbor around 12:45 to pick up my parents. It took me about 40 minutes to get to the front of the building to pick them up. It took another 20 minutes to get out of the area. So that really destroyed any sleep I really planned on getting. I didn't go to sleep until about 2:20.

I had all of my alarms set. The one on my phone and my watch to make sure that I got up. We got up and made it out of the house by 5:45. The ride to our parking spot was simple. The walk to the metro stop was simple. Buying the ticket to get on the metro was simple. Getting on the metro was simple. And that is where simple ended. We got on at Eisenhower Avenue. (Seems right to get on at a presidential last name station to go see an inauguration). We had only 7 stops to our destination. The first 3 stops not that crowded. Crystal City station is where it went downhill. For as many people already on the train already, there were probably double that wanted to get on at the this station and next 2. If you have a want for personal space, this was not going to be your day.

We arrived at L'Efant Plaza at about 7:15. We got out of the station around 7:50. Yes that means it took us 35 minutes to get out of the station. It was the calmest I have every seen that many people. You would thought we were going to a concert. There was singing, chanting and everybody of every color being nice to each other.

The walk to the mall took about 20 minutes, this was only because the sheer amount of people going in the same direction. Walking down Independence Ave, I began to really get a grip on what was about to happen. Even though my parents, my sister or brother weren't there, I felt I had to be there for them. My parents remember the election of John F. Kennedy. When he was assissinated, my parents were 20 and my sister was 2 months old. Both of my parents to this day remember exactly where they were on November 22, 1963.

My parents watched how Martin Luther King, Jr. was beginning to show people that certain life liberties should be had by all. My dad says that on the day that King gave his I have been to the Mountaintop speech, that King sounded like he knew his death was coming. My parents were in Tuskegee, Alabama on April 4, 1968. My parents were 25, my sister 4 1/2, and my brother was 10 days old.

As citizen of New York, my mom probably voted for Robert Kennedy to become a senator. They remember when he announced that he was going to run for President. Again, my parents remember exactly where they were on June 5, 1968 when he got shot. My parents were 25, my sister 4 1/2, and my brother was 3 months old.

So as I walk to The Mall, I think about the fact that my dad said to me on the day of the election, that he never thought an African-American would be elected to be the President of the United States during his lifetime. It was cold, but I need to be there. I need to be able to tell my children that I was there. I need to have pictures from that day. I need to experience the Sea of Humanity.

Unlike others, I wasn't as impressed by Barack Obama's creditianls because I had grown up in an upper-middle class family. My dad has a PhD in Microbiology. My cousin is a lawyer and married to a lawyer. Educated black men was mainly what I have been surrounded by. Obama's educational background was the norm for my family, but I was impressed at how he was able to pull everyone together no matter their age, race or educational background.

To stand about 12 city blocks away from the Capitol was just exciting. No I couldn't see the Capitol well, but I didn't care. I was there on the Mall. I was hearing it. I was experiencing a moment in history. I was apart of the Sea